C

Line: It’s not you, it’s me.
Translation: It’s you.

Line (Version 2): It’s not you, it’s me.
Translation: It’s not you, it’s that hottie from the gym that I’m going out with on Friday

Line: We’re not connecting on an intellectual level.
Translation: You’re boring, and even the hot sex isn’t hot any more because you’re too stupid to think of more than three moves.

Line: We have nothing in common
Translation: Everything you do makes me want to stick a fork in my eye. Or yours.

Line: We’ve grown apart
Translation: I’ve grown up and you’ve grown potatoes in your butt from sitting on the couch

Line: You’re too good for me
Translation: I’m too good for you

Line (Version 1): You’re too good for me
Translation: You’re so uptight and anal that if you were going out with Jesus you’d nag him to shave

Line: I just need some space right now
Translation: And a restraining order, you clingy freak

Line: I think we should just be friends
Translation: We’ll never be friends, I just want you to go away.

Line: I think we should see other people
Translation: I already am

Line: We need to talk
Translation: We need to stop talking. Forever.

Line: I’m not ready for a commitment
Translation: I’ve already slept with you and I’m bored. I also may have slept with your best friend.

Line: I don’t know what I want
Translation: I would still like to keep you hanging on in case I’m bored on a Saturday or my other booty call doesn’t work out.

Line: —
Translation: I am going to be the disappearing kind of person who stops taking your calls until you figure it out for yourself.

And the all-time, killer breakup line award goes to…..

Line: So, how do you think this is going?
Translation: I want this to seem like a mutual breakup so you don’t hate me and try to kill me in my sleep. PS Can I have my key back now?

The following semaphore characters are presented as one would face the signalman:

Rest / Space	Numerals	Attention	A	B
C Acknowledge/Correct	D	E (8x) Error	F	G
H	I	J or Letters Letters / Position Sign	K Invitation to Transmit	L
M	N	O	P	Q
R	S	T	U	V
W	X	Y	Z

Tip of the day: If you have one of those days where it just doesn't feel right to be stuck inside an office, a classroom, your room or whatever other boring place for the whole day, do the following (read it all before you start):

a) Go to the city center
b) Hop on to some bars, cafes, art shops, trendy places
c) Grab those free postcards, one or two of each. They are free to take, grab at least 20, not all form the same place
d) Head to a sunny, well ventilated place. Preferably where you can sit down and write (e.g. beach, public garden, patio, esplanade, outdoor bar...)
e) Start writing to all of your friends from all over Europe
f) You should have probably brought a pen with you
g) And you should also have some way of getting their addresses from the internet... (Private Area, Facebook, Address book...) or just get them before leaving the boring place you're in (I'm sure that boring place has internet... all boring places do)
h) After you're done writing the postcards write STS where the Stamp should go
i) Enjoy the sunny day
j) Put the postcards into several different post boxes all through the city

that's it... wait a few days / week and we'll see who gets your postcard.

The advantages of this method are that it's free, you enjoy a sunny day outside instead of being stuck in an boring place, and you send a postcard to all of your friends, which is something I'm sure you keep thinking of doing, but never get around to actually doing...